I had not planned to write a another blog this month but am so outraged by ignorant, arrogant and chauvinistic comments by a social media "guru" recently that I felt I had to address the topic.
The bulk of this blog will be facts and information, then I will discuss issues involved and provide two examples of real life experiences that I have come across in my 30 plus year career in working as a nurse and counselor.
Please note that my focus is on sexual assault not just physical assault, however there is usually and element of both.
What is sexual assault ?
Sexual assault occurs when a person is forced, coerced or tricked into sexual acts against their will or without their consent, or if a child or young person under 18 is exposed to sexual activities.
Sexual assault is a crime. Sexual assault is not the victim's fault.
Sexual assault can happen to anyone in our community. This includes people who are young or old, male or female, from any cultural background, wealthy or not so wealthy, married or not. Anyone can be a victim of sexual assault.
Most victims of sexual assault know the person who assaulted them, such as a family member or friend or someone from work, school, church or another social group. A person you don't know or have just met can commit sexual assault.
Women and men as victims of sexual assault are treated equally under the law.
Describing sexual assault
The terms used in the community to describe the different forms of sexual assault are different from the legal terms used to prosecute offenders in the courts. This section describes the different terms often used in the community when talking about sexual assault. Go to the section called commonly used legal terms for more details about how the law defines sexual assault offences.
Sexual assault is also known as sexual abuse, or rape.
Commonly used terms which describe sexual assault in the community are:
Rape is a term used in the community which describes the forced penetration of the vagina or anus of any person with any part of the body of another person, or any object, against their will or consent. It also includes oral sex. In NSW Criminal Law, the term rape is no longer used. It has been replaced by the unisex term, sexual intercourse without consent. Click here for more details about commonly used legal definitions.
Incest is known in the community as sexual assault by a family member or close relative. Some people in the community see incest as child sexual abuse, however, the legal definition of incest is different.
Indecent assault is unwanted touching of a person's body by another person. For example it can include kissing or inappropriate touching of a person's breasts, bottom or genitals.
Child sexual abuse is any sexual act or threat to a child or young person under the age of 16 that causes them harm or causes them to be frightened or fearful. Children and young people are sexually assaulted when a person uses their age, size, authority or position of trust to force the child into a sexual activity. This can include a range of behaviors such as forcing a child or young person to: look at pornographic magazines or DVDs; watch someone masturbate; be kissed, touched or fondled in a sexual way or to sexually penetrate them.
http://www.victimsservices.justice.nsw.gov.au/sexualassault/Pages/sexual_assault_victims.aspx
How common is sexual assault?
It is difficult to assess how many people have been victims of sexual assault as assaults often are not reported, I will discuss this later.
The latest statistics I could find are from 2015 for Australia but updated below..
How common is sexual assault?
It is difficult to assess how many people have been victims of sexual assault as assaults often are not reported, I will discuss this later.
The latest statistics I could find are from 2015 for Australia but updated below..
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| 13 July 2016 |
Reports of sexual assault reach six-year high
Reports of sexual assault have reached a six-year high on the back of a three per cent rise since last year, according to figures released by the Australian Bureau of Statistics (ABS) today.
William Milne from the ABS said that the Recorded Crime - Victims publication revealed that “there were 21,380 victims of sexual assault recorded by police during 2015.
"This was an increase of three per cent on the previous year, and the highest number of sexual assault reports we’ve seen in six years," said Mr Milne.
“Nationally, over four in five sexual assault victims were female.
"Females aged between 15 and 19 years were seven times more likely to have been a victim of sexual assault compared to the overall population.”
In Australia rape and sexual assault statistics are collected by state.
http://www.sbs.com.au/news/article/2015/07/17/sexual-assault-how-common-it-Australia
Even as a mental health professional it can be very difficult sometimes to understand why someone has not or will not report sexual assaults.
Hopefully the below information will help you understand this.
Why do many people not report sexual assaults?
The main reason is fear of how they will be treated if they do.
-Some people have reported that the police have not believed them or taken them seriously.
- They may believe that it happened too long ago for them to lodge the assault.
- The first thing most victims want to do is clean themselves, they will scrub and scrub until their skin is raw trying to wash off the memories, smells and of the touching, groping and molestation. Even if they then decide to report the assault they may have washed away most of the evidence.
- Fear of retaliation, especially for children, the perpetrator may have made threats to the child.
"Damaging myths that women fabricate rape and make accusations to ruin men's lives stops many people from reporting what happened to them. Survivors worry that they won't be believed.
Some victims may not even know that what happened to them was assault. There are so many
people that are not aware of the truth, which is this: If you didn't consent to doing something with someone, and they do that thing anyway, it's assault. Even if you flirted. Even if you were drinking. Even if you were wearing a short skirt.
Even if you said "yes" during a previous encounter, Even if you said "yes" to doing the same thing with someone else.
Feeling humiliated. Not wanting people to know what happened.
There's also a stigma. Some survivors may believe that being assaulted makes them "damaged goods," and are afraid of being judged that was completely not their fault and be seen as "damaged goods".
They do not want to relive the experience and the trauma again.
Knowing that even once someone goes through the process of reporting, re-living what happened, having a rape kit done, and going to court and facing the person who attacked them, it's very uncommon for people accused of assault to actually get charged with the crime."
http://www.self.com/story/why-women-dont-report-sexual-assault
Many victims repress the memories, especially if they were a child and sometimes the memories do not surface until later in life and not always in a direct way.
Some examples from my experiences.
Approximately 3/4 of clients I counsel have been victims of sexual abuse and in the majority have not reported the crimes.
Some have said they had tried to tell someone who had not believed them and in some cases had been punished for fabricating myths, especially when the perpetrator was a family member/relative/close family friend.
Examples of when memories had been suppressed:
Repression of memories -
One female client presented very distressed and anxious and did not know why.
She was engaged to be married, very much in love, yet considering cancelling the wedding.
After several sessions to develop a rapport with her and gain her trust, she recalled and revealed that she had been sexually assaulted as a child and had blocked the memory.
She had "saved her virginity" for her husband and subconsciously was terrified about having a sexual relationship, felt "dirty" and as if she was "used goods" and was betraying her fiancée as technically she no longer was a virgin.
Not being aware of what sexual assault is -
This lady presented as distressed. She was married and was unaware that her husband was committing domestic violence towards her.
(Domestic violence was discussed in an earlier blog)
When asked about their relationship she confided that when she did not feel like having sexual intercourse with him, she would try and run away as he would try and force himself upon her and at times she had cowered on the floor in corners and he had physically dragged her by her hair then sexually assaulted her, These assaults were increasing and becoming more violent.
She believed that as they were married she should do what he wanted regardless of her choices.
I don't know about my readers, but my personal view is that marriage vows do not believe that his behavior is acceptable and constitutes physical and sexual assault.
The majority of people that have been assaulted from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder.
Also known as PTSD.
Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) is a mental health condition that's triggered by a terrifying event — either experiencing it or witnessing it. Symptoms may include flashbacks, nightmares and severe anxiety, as well as uncontrollable thoughts about the event.
Many people who go through traumatic events have difficulty adjusting and coping for a while, but they don't have PTSD — with time and good self-care, they usually get better. But if the symptoms get worse or last for months or even years and interfere with your functioning, you may have PTSD.
For more information regarding PTSD:
https://www.beyondblue.org.au/the-facts/anxiety/types-of-anxiety/ptsd
Summary
If you have been, or know of someone that has sadly been a victim of sexual assault, please seek help.
Even if you do not decide to report it, counseling is available.
If you are assaulted, please go straight to a hospital.
They will want to perform a rape kit which is distressing but you will be supported through this.
Most hospitals have specialized counselors on call for such situations.
You will not be forced to lodge a complaint but the samples will be kept in case you change your mind at a later date.
Some people will tell you that you should report the assault so that if caught the perpetrator may not assault anyone else but this is your choice, only YOU know what you can cope with.
Others that have not been in your situation have absolutely NO RIGHT to judge you.
Statute of limitations
How long after a sexual assault can it be reported.
This varies whether regarding the victim is a child or adult, what country it occurred in and in some countries this can vary from state to state.
Your counselor can advise you of this.
Children
Health Professionals in Australia are mandated to report any even suspicions of child abuse.
Helpful contacts for victims of sexual assault in Australia
http://www.dvconnect.org/sexual-assault-helpline-2/
https://www.1800respect.org.au/
http://au.reachout.com/sexual-assault-support
https://www.bravehearts.org.au/?gclid=CLGBhZyY9tACFVEIvAodsbMACA
http://www.childwise.org.au/page/8/child-wise-national-child-abuse-prevention-help-line
All feedback and comments welcomed.
